BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
