So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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