Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
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