i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize