Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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