I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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