I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
