Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
