it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
