Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
