Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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