And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
