They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
She even gives head with a lisp.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
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