So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
