I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
