can u get pink eye on your cock?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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