It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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