Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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