K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize