Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
