So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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