I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
