apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
