I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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