Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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