this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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