Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
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