Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
