I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Randomize