Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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