Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
