Your tits are I can't wait for
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
