Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
