I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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