dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize
