is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize