Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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