dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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