Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
