I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
