so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I think i got beer on your cat.
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