Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
