new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
