honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
