Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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