I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
