love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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