I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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