new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
