I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
