we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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