elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
