Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
